A Note to Our Friends...

After a few days of alone time and a great deal of reflection (not to mention a too-long-not-to-be-noticed absence from work) we've decided to send the below email to our friends and family:

Friends,
Please let me apologize in advance for providing this information via email, but I need to ask you all to respect my desire to avoid discussing this repeatedly. Erin and I are tremendously appreciative of the support we've received thus far. I'll attempt to bring you into the loop and express my sincere gratitude for all of your kindness.

This past Monday we had a comprehensive ultrasound and an amniocentesis. The results of the amnio revealed that the baby has an additional chromosome #18. Trisomy 18, the name of this particular chromosomal disorder, is quite severe. Among other things, the ultrasound also revealed a ventricular septal defect: an opening between the lower chambers of the heart which prevents the heart from pumping blood correctly. This particular chromosomal abnormality combined with the severe heart defect (which is not an unusual symptom of Trisomy 18) create what our doctors consider a lethal condition.

Again, I apologize for sending this in an email; it's just easier than talking about it. I promise to try to keep you all informed.

The support of our friends and family will get us through this. Thank you.

Sean and Erin

In retrospect, we should have been more clear on a few points. 1) If you have questions, please ask us. It's not that we don't want to talk about it, it's more that we don't want to explain the scenario over and over again. 2) Please act normal. It was difficult enough to handle the news on its own. This discomfort was compounded when it was clear there were people who thought it better to ignore us completely, than say the wrong thing.

I can certainly respect this. Here is what the Trisomy 18 Foundation recommends.